I just truly care about helping people, and it is so hard for me to have that completely stripped from me. I thought this whole hoax would be over by the time it was lip warmer time - and I’m not just talking about my ‘stache. Stupid masks!Īll I can do now is angrily stomp everywhere and bang my fists against my archnemesis, drywall, like a real man. or is Movember something about cancer? Doesn’t matter, anyways. Now, who’s going to know that I pull off that five o’clock shadow AND that I spread awareness for Movember? No Nut November is such an important cause to me. The apparently “mandatory” face masks doomed the world, depriving all females of laying eyes upon my rugged, handsome November face.

The world awaits me and my Movember stubble. No other month is as freeing for men to finally resist all the hatred in the world directed at them by dirtbags like Vogue that put a guy in a dress on the cover.ĭo you know how ridiculous society’s expectations for men to shave this small portion of his body is?! I wait for midnight to strike every year on October 31 - with only my closest 24 homies gathered for our Halloween party, of course - and we count down in our sexy cop outfits until the month of shaving liberation. No other month in the year is as socially accepting for men. Fellas of all shapes and sizes, of all hair colours and textures, of all Call of Duty usernames, it’s time for us to rise up and prove just how manly and masculine us men can be.

Pube stache